The Best Gift

Here is what you have been waiting for: The Best Gift you can give your children.  And it is, of course, Jesus Christ.

The tricky part is- this is not something that is as easy to do.  We can't force our kids to love Jesus, or to accept Him as their savior.

This is not about being the perfect, Christlike parent who never makes mistakes.  We are all sinners- saved by grace (if we have accepted Him as our savior and asked for forgiveness) and we are going to make mistakes- right in front of our children.  They need to see our lives as we walk authentically with God, in front of them.  And they need to see us acknowledge our own need for a savior.  When we do make mistakes, when we do sin, they need to see us repent, ask forgiveness, and then move forward in the joy of forgiveness, not living under condemnation or guilt.  This type of authentic modeling of the Christian walk, and of our active, living relationship (not religion or rule-following) with God will speak volumes to our kids.  We cannot give what we do not have, and so, the best way to pass on our faith to our children- to "overflow" into their lives, is to be first filled up ourselves.


Of course it's important to have family nights, family devotions, go to church together, etc.  But those things will ring hollow with religiosity unless our kids see us living them out in our own lives.   


We can use every opportunity- sibling fights, honors they have received, honors for which they were passed over, birthday parties they weren't invited to, successes, failures, joys and disappointments- to point them to Christ and Him at work in their life.  Likewise, we need to use (and model for our children) letting all of those things in our own lives point us to Christ.


Above all, we need to pray, pray, and pray some more.  The Holy Spirit is the only one who can draw our children's hearts to Himself.  We can set a good example and "do" all the right things, but only He can truly reach their spirit.  The power packed into consistent prayer for our children is more than we realize.

As we enter into 2011, take time to prayerfully reflect on your parenting, the model you are presenting to your children and your own relationship with Christ.  In what areas have you done well in 2010?  In what areas would you like to grow further in 2011?

The Second Best Gift

Drumroll...the second best gift you can give your children is: A good marriage and a stable family life.

How can we do this?

Just like we talked about intentional parenting, now we need to consider intentional marriage-ing.  Investing in our marriages.

One of my goals for the new year is to make that weekly date-night a priority.  We get date nights- just not weekly, but I think that set-aside time, even if we're not going fancy places or spending a lot of money, is invaluable.  It's easier in the summer, I think....my husband and I have found that sitting together around a fire in our fire pit after the kids have gone to bed is a great connecting time for us.  Just sitting...away from texting and facebook and TV...chatting and enjoying each other's company.  It helps that my husband is a teacher, so he is less busy in the summer.  So how do we bring that special time into the school year?  We're working on it.  I think the point is to make this a priority.

Another thing that is helpful to us is having a regular, early bedtime for our children, so we have some time each evening to reconnect.  We also try to get away for a weekend, just the two of us, at least once or twice a year.  Hopefully eventually it can be more frequently and maybe for longer, but while our kids are young, I think we do well to get a weekend once or twice a year. :)

On a daily basis, investing in a kiss that is more than a peck each morning, taking time to laugh together, plan together, help each other, and looking for ways to bless each other in the little things.

Proverbs 18:21 The tongue has the power of life and death, 
   and those who love it will eat its fruit.

We need to take this verse very seriously. (This also applies to our children!)  How do we speak to (and about) our spouse?  Are we sarcastic and cutting?  Are we rude and angry?  We need to avoid this kind of talk and make a point to speak in a life-giving way to our spouse.  Not just "you're doing a great job" but just speaking kindly to them as we go about our day, saying "please" and "thank you."  Not only will this benefit our relationship, but it sets an example to our children of how to interact with each other, and eventually, in their own marriage.  

Investing in your marriage is the second best gift you can give your kids.  How do you invest in your marr

The Third Best Gift

It is so fun to watch your kids open presents.  Honestly, I like that better than getting presents myself (not that I don't like getting presents, but you know what I mean).  Buying them things that I know they'll love and waiting for that reaction of delight.  Imagine how much more God loves to give us things that He knows we'll love!  But sometimes, just like the tantrums that sometimes erupt from the over-stimulation of gift-opening on Christmas morning (I can't tell you how tempted I've been to do the 12-days of Christmas idea to stretch out the gift-opening!  If we didn't travel so much this time of year, I probably would do it!) we can't always handle what we THINK we can handle in terms of gifts.  It's an interesting thought...and an encouragement to be faithful in little, and thankful for what we do have.  

Anyway, I was pondering what the BEST gift you could give your kids is...and I've come up with what I believe to be the top three...which we'll stretch out over the next couple days to keep you coming back. :)

James 1:17 Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.


Soooooo, here it is: The Third Best Gift you can give your kids: Intentional Parenting.  While many of us took planning, time and effort to become parents, others of us kind of fell into it.  Either way, getting through the "baby" months, as challenging as they can be, is only the beginning.  We have, roughly 18 years, a relatively small amount of time to invest in the lives of our children, to guide them and coach them into the adults they will be and impress upon them the things that will ultimately affect many other people.  The movie "It's a Wonderful Life" (which, if you haven't seen it, stop reading this blog and go watch it) is a good reminder to how many lives one life can touch- for better or for worse.

Someone spoke wisely once to say "the days are long but the years are short" when it comes to raising our children.  It is easy to get caught up in the day-to-day needs of our family...laundry, food, homework, dance lessons, soccer,  more food, more laundry, and (man am I making good use of cliches today) miss the forest for the trees.  But we need to begin with the end in mind.  What kind of people do we ultimately want our children to be, and what are we doing now to train them in that way?  I'm really excited about some of the things we'll talk about in January related to goal-setting for your family and your kids...so make sure you check back then!

Tradition!

Tradition! In my family, this word is always sung to the tune of "Tradition!" from the musical "Fiddler on the Roof."  Traditions are indeed important.  I've read many articles from family experts who tout the importance of traditions for helping children to feel a sense of belonging and identity.  So how do we do it?  I believe it is part intentional and part accidental.  Some more experienced parents I've talked with have said that often, the kids come up with the traditions.  What we did once as a family becomes something "we ALWAYS do...(fill in the blank)."  And that's how it starts.  Some of the more intentional traditions may come as something you hear about and decide to try, or things that may help meet family goals.  Family goals...hmmm...more on that coming soon.  

One intentional tradition that our family has started doing at Christmastime is driving around and looking at lights.  It does not have a great deal of significance other than nice family time.  We do have several traditions, although I had hoped to add some more this year...unfortunately the Christmas season got away from me and we weren't able to do all that I had hoped.  But that's okay...rather than stressing ourselves out on our days off to check off things on the "traditions" list, we were able to spend some good quality down time together, that I believe was more valuable.  

What traditions does your family have, and how do you balance doing traditions with enjoying "down time?"

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer

The True Story of Rudolph

A man named Bob May, depressed and brokenhearted, stared out his drafty apartment window into the chilling December night.

His 4-year-old daughter Barbara sat on his lap quietly sobbing. Bob's wife, Evelyn, was dying of cancer Little Barbara couldn't understand why her mommy could never come home. Barbara looked up into her dad's eyes and asked, "Why isn't Mommy just like everybody else's Mommy?" Bob's jaw tightened and his eyes welled with tears. Her question brought waves of grief, but also of anger. It had been the story of Bob's life. Life always had to be different for Bob.

Small when he was a kid, Bob was often bullied by other boys. He was too little at the time to compete in sports. He was often called names he'd rather not remember. From childhood, Bob was different and never seemed to fit in. Bob did complete college, married his loving wife and was grateful to get his job as a copywriter at Montgomery Ward during the Great Depression. Then he was blessed with his little girl. But it was all short-lived. Evelyn's bout with cancer stripped them of all their savings and now Bob and his daughter were forced to live in a two-room apartment in the Chicago slums. Evelyn died just days before Christmas in 1938.

Bob struggled to give hope to his child, for whom he couldn't even afford to buy a Christmas gift. But if he couldn't buy a gift, he was determined to make one - a storybook! Bob had created an animal character in his own mind and told the animal's story to little Barbara to give her comfort and hope. Again and again Bob told the story, embellishing it more with each telling. Who was the character? What was the story all about? The story Bob May created was his own autobiography in fable form. The character he created was a misfit outcast like he was. The name of the character? A little reindeer named Rudolph, with a big shiny nose. Bob finished the book just in time to give it to his little girl on Christmas Day. But the story doesn't end there. 

The general manager of Montgomery Ward caught wind of the little storybook and offered Bob May a nominal fee to purchase the rights to print the book. Wards went on to print,_ Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer_ and distribute it to children visiting Santa Claus in their stores. By 1946 Wards had printed and distributed more than six million copies of Rudolph. That same year, a major publisher wanted to purchase the rights from Wards to print an updated version of the book.

In an unprecedented gesture of kindness, the CEO of Wards returned all rights back to Bob May. The book became a best seller. Many toy and marketing deals followed and Bob May, now remarried with a growing family, became wealthy from the story he created to comfort his grieving daughter. But the story doesn't end there either. 

Bob's brother-in-law, Johnny Marks, made a song adaptation to Rudolph. Though the song was turned down by such popular vocalists as Bing Crosby and Dinah Shore , it was recorded by the singing cowboy, Gene Autry.  "Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer" was released in 1949 and became a phenomenal success, selling more records than any other Christmas song, with the exception of "White Christmas." 

The gift of love that Bob May created for his daughter so long ago kept on returning back to bless him again and again. And Bob May learned the lesson, just like his dear friend Rudolph, that being different isn't so bad. In fact, being different can be a blessing. 

What God wants for Christmas

I'm always on the lookout for good parenting tools, and today I'm going to focus on one that we've used for a few years now: What God Wants for Christmas.  This little package contains a fold-out manger scene, seven gift boxes, and a book.  The book is a storybook, but it also contains information for parents to guide them through using this product.  I believe it is meant to be used (at least this is how we use it!) every night for the last week before Christmas.  Each night we read the next section of the book, open the next gift, and work to complete the manger scene.  In some ways it would be nice if the little scene just sat quietly up on the shelf, but my kids LOVE to play with it!  Thankfully the characters for the scene are well-made and I have yet to have one break.  (They are plastic).  Ultimately, the gifts lead us to a realization of the Gospel message.  I won't spoil it for you and tell you what is in the 7th box, but now, even though my kids know what's coming, they still love it and look forward to it each year, and especially each day we are doing it.  Naomi keeps asking me if it's time to start it yet!  The book is really helpful in giving parents guidance as to leading a child to Christ, and the whole project is a lot of fun- and a lot of anticipation and patience on the side of the kids, which is always a good thing. :)  I would highly recommend this product- if you do a "family" gift, this would be a perfect choice! 

Generosity-caught not taught

In Luke 15:11-32, Jesus tells the parable of the prodigal son.  In fall 2009, our church studied the book "The Prodigal God" by Tim Keller, which focused on this parable.  The title of the book was a little surprising to me until I read about another meaning of the word "prodigal," which means "to lavishly spend it all."  Wow.  Just like the father in the story, our Heavenly Father spent it all, lavishly, on us.

As you may have noticed, generosity is our monthly character trait that we are focusing on.  Each month I'll be sharing ideas of how to promote these character traits with our children.  Generosity is one of those that you just can't force.  You can force your kid to give someone else the toy, or the last cookie, but doesn't necessarily mean that he/she is being generous from the heart.  So how do you get there?

My father is probably the most generous person that I know.  Growing up, we certainly had our needs (and many wants) provided for- if my father could do it for us, he did it.  But I don't think (easy for me to say!) that we were spoiled.  Somehow, the nature of generosity got passed to us.  Not only was he generous with us, but he was generous with many others.  We opened our home to some young people who needed a place to stay- one girl ended up living with us for several years, a few different times, and my dad eventually walked her down the aisle at her wedding...in place of her birth father, who had not been a good one.  I know (although I think I wasn't supposed to know) that he paid for a whole bunch of dental work for someone, paid off someone else's school debt (they never knew who did it), took (and paid for) a friends' family on vacation, helped me and my husband out numerous times financially...and those are just the ones I know about.  He has always had a heart for the struggling kid...always hiring teens and college-age kids who need some money to come out and do yardwork.  And he always used those working times to help mentor them, and get them on the right path.  Although my dad had a good career, we were never wealthy (by US standards) so my dad didn't give out of his overabundance...but he gave what he had.  I don't know that I'm as generous as he, but I hope to be.  And I hope to pass that legacy of generosity onto my own children.  I truly believe that generosity is caught, not taught.

Generosity can look different ways, too....not only with money.  Time is a currency...in many ways more valuable even than money.  We could sacrifice time, convenience, comfort-level, or that last piece of chocolate cake, just to be generous.

Start with your own family.  Are you stingy with your time?  Don't be a Scrooge. :) Give your kids or your spouse some undivided attention.  Make that extra-special dinner that takes so much more work, but you know they love it.  My mother was particularly good at this kind of generosity.  She did so much for us that I never realized until I was much older.  I know sometimes when I've done something nice, or generous for someone (usually in my family) I feel the need to point it out to them.  But those things are usually best when done humbly and secretly.

God, the perfect parent, modeled perfect generosity as he sent Jesus to us.  Let's learn from His modeling, and share that generosity with our own kids.  Let's be generous with ALL our resources- they're really all His anyway.  We heard such amazing testimonies from the Outflow experiments of practical ways to share God's love...let's not stop now!  Keep being filled, and filling others.

How do you practice generosity?  Who has been generous with you?

Jolly Old Saint Nicholas

So, what do your kids know about the REAL St. Nick?  If you read up on this fellow, it's a neat way to share the history of the legend of Santa Claus with your kids (if you're ready to go there).  We have this book that is a nice retelling of the story and shows St. Nicholas' true generosity and love for Christ and others. (Don't forget generosity is our monthly character trait!)

Nativity Drama

Just a reminder that this weekend (Friday, Saturday and Sunday) Three Springs will be performing an AMAZING Nativity drama each night at 6:00, 7:00, and 8:00.  It is not to be missed!  Make a family night of it and enjoy this moving performance!  Dress warmly since it is mostly outdoors. There will even be cookies and hot chocolate afterwards!

Jesse Tree Advent Celebration

I know we're already well into the Advent season, but I found a great FREE resource that I wanted to share with you.  If you go to this website: A Holy Experience, you can read about: A Jesus Advent Celebration: A Jesse Tree Journey.  You can download it here.  What a great way to share a more spiritual side of this season with your children!  It gives wonderful daily scripture readings along with discussion starters, prayer suggestions, and "action items" It also comes with printable paper ornaments to put on your "Jesse Tree" each day- perfect for your kids!  It also presents the gospel message, which is the whole point of Jesus coming to earth in the first place!  Take advantage of this free resource!

Test Podcast

VK News

Just wanted to remind you of a few things...the new Vineyard Kids News page is up!

Also- check out the Vineyard Kids Calendar for some family fun ideas and you'll also see that this weekend (today!) is Dickens of a Christmas in Wellsboro!  Be sure to dress warmly and come out to support local vendors and have a good Christmas-y time!

Don't forget that next weekend is Three Springs Ministry's Nativity Production which is HIGHLY worth seeing!  Our church is partnering with First Presbyterian Church of Wellsboro as well as Three Springs Ministries and will be taking a bus (or two!) out to the program.  If you're interested, the bus will be leaving the church at 5:00, so be there and again, dress warmly!  Feel free to invite some friends who maybe wouldn't normally be able to get out to something like this!  And best of all, it's free!

Book Club!

I want to invite all of you to join me for an online book club!  We will be starting in January since I wanted to give everyone time to get the book. I'm hoping each month to read a different parenting book.  As an opener to the parenting homegroup that I believe will be happening this spring, the first book we're going to go through is Raising Kids Who Turn Out Right, by Tim Kimmel.

The parenting homegroup will be going through the book and DVD series "Grace-Based Parenting," also by Tim Kimmel.  I had the pleasure of hearing Dr. Kimmel speak at the MOPS Convention in 2009, and his scriptural, practical advice for raising children was so refreshing and helpful.  So, get Raising Kids Who Turn Out Right, and join me for discussion here on the blog in January!

Monthly Theme: Generosity

Can you believe it's December already?  Wow- time flies. :)  How appropriate that it snowed!  I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving, and now we are smack dab in the middle of the "holidays."  Hopefully everyone you are all making progress on your various lists!

Now that we are in a new month, that means it's time to focus on a new character word. This month's theme is: Generosity.  At a time of year when everyone (kids especially) can have a tendency to get greedy, if we focus on being generous, it takes the focus off of ourselves.

Acts 20:25 In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ ”

I think as parents we know this to be true as we think about, plan, and prepare what gifts we will give our children.  I know for me this is the reason I tend to over-give gifts to them-- it is so delightful to see them delighted!  

With toddlers and preschoolers it can be overwhelming to them to receive a ton of gifts, and then you get into the whole "Okay, we don't have time to play with that now, it's time to open more gifts!" situation, which is kind of ridiculous!  I know some people with young kids who spread out the gift-opening throughout the day, or even over several days.  Some people choose to do it in a "12-days of Christmas" scenario.  But I digress...

Even a two-year-old can be taken to the dollar store to buy gifts for family and friends, and it is SO fun for them!  Or better yet, make a plan with your children to make gifts for family and friends.  Involving them in the process helps them to understand the idea of giving, as well as the idea of getting, and being thankful. 

How do you grow generosity in your kids?

PS: Just in case anyone is wondering about the giveaway from last week- no one commented, so the giveaway, sadly, went by the wayside.  Hopefully we'll get some more conversation going here and next time we have a giveaway someone will be able to benefit from it! :)

Our First Giveaway!

Listed on our list of resources both here on the blog and on the Wellsboro Vineyard website is the magazine Thriving Family.  It is published by Focus on the Family and is full of great ideas for families!  I don't know about you but I am a magazine junkie.  I LOVE 'em!  And this is one that I read and re-read each time it comes.  One of my goals is to get parenting resources into the hands of parents, and now I have this great opportunity!  I am thrilled to offer this month, a 1-year subscription to the magazine Thriving Family.

How do you enter?  I'm so glad you asked!  Just leave a comment below!  Be sure to include your name so I know who you are and can get in contact with you. :)

IF you have never left a comment on a blog before, click on the tab at the top of the page that says "How to leave a comment" and it will guide you!

You can also earn a SECOND entry by participating in a little virtual scavenger hunt!  C'mon, it'll be fun!  Here are the instructions:
1. Go to the Wellsboro Vineyard Website at www.wellsborovineyard.org
2. Once you are there, you must find the answer to this question: What special family fun idea is on the Vineyard Kids calendar for November 29th?
3. Once you have found the answer, email me at carolyn@wellsborovineyard.org with the answer!

You can earn a THIRD entry by completing the activity listed on the Vineyard Kids calendar for Monday, November 29th and then emailing me at carolyn@wellsborovineyard.org and telling me what you did and how it went!  I will trust your honesty. :)

Winner will be chosen at random from all entries and announced on Tuesday, November 30.  Giveaway entries CLOSE at midnight on Monday, November 29.

*Disclaimer: This offer is only available to parents who attend the Vineyard Church of Wellsboro.

Spiritual Parenting: The Trinity

Egghead...


Recently, my middle daughter (who just turned 4) asked me: "How can God be God, and Jesus be God?"  I stumbled and mumbled something that I can't remember and I'm sure wasn't very helpful to her, but it got me thinking that I need to be able to illuminate spiritual mysteries to my kids in a practical way.

I came across an article in the children's ministry magazine K! by Alan Root where he shared the following three illustrations that help to share the idea of the Trinity with children (and adults!).

Illustration #1: Mathematics. 1+1+1=3.  And 1x1x1=1.  So 3 ones can be either 3 or 1 depending on how you compile them.

Illustration #2: Physics. H20 exists as a gas, a liquid and a solid.  Vapor, water, and ice.  But it's all still H20.

Illustration #3: Biology. from Gallus Domesticus (the chicken).  A single egg has three parts: outside shell, egg white, and egg yolk.  3 parts--one egg.


The age of your child or children may determine which of these illustrations will be most useful to you right now...but remember that discussing the idea of the God-head shouldn't be a one-time conversation, so maybe those other examples will be useful later.  You can also share with your kids how they, in fact, are 3-in-1 as well...spirit, soul (mind, or brain) and body.  We are indeed fearfully and wonderfully made in His image.

Interestingly enough, the word "trinity" does not appear in the Bible, but the concept is clearly taught throughout Scripture.  Root also mentions that these illustrations are just that- illustrations, and they are not perfect in explaining the mystery of the Trinity.  Ultimately, the one-ness of Father God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit is something our human brains cannot fully understand.  

Happy Thanksgiving!

1 Chronicles 16:34 Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever.

In the midst of eating and watching the game and the parade and after-meal napping, 

How will you connect with the heart of your family this Thanksgiving?

Help!

Okay parents, (specifically Vineyard Parents, but anyone can weigh in!) I'm having trouble making a decision (a shocking realization for me :) and I want your help!  Since this blog is primarily for you, or for us, as a group, I want you to help me think of a name for this blog.  I think "Wellsboro Vineyard Kids" is too boring, and I want other parents out there in cyberspace to not feel excluded, if they have something valuable to offer.  Sooo...what do you think?  Right now I have it listed as "Parenting: It's a marathon, not a sprint."  Other ideas I've had are "Extreme Parenting," "Intentional Parenting." etc.  I want it to sound fun and exciting and not just educational, but I want it to be clear that it is about parenting. Share your thoughts on my ideas, share your own ideas...


What do you think???

Vineyard Kids News Update!

Click here for the latest Vineyard Kids News Update!

Thankfulness: Madame Blueberry

https://bigidea.com/products/shows/shows_content.aspx?pid=22

I find it amazing the things that I have learned from kids products...for myself!  One of those is the VeggieTales show Madame Blueberry. If you haven't seen this one, I highly recommend it.  The main tagline: "A thankful heart is a happy heart" has stuck with me and come to mind at times when I was discontented or complaining.  I think my daughter may have even reminded me of it a time or two.  Kids have an uncanny way of showing us our own weaknesses.  If we can let go of our pride, we can learn a lot from them. This is the last post (for now) devoted to our monthly theme of Thankfulness.  I'm SURE we'll revisit it at some point, but we're closing out this series for now. I hope it's been helpful and I would love to hear your feedback!

What kids products (or things your kids have said) have impacted YOUR spriritual walk?

Family Fun

Here are some Family Fun ideas for this weekend!  Spend some time playing with your kids! Appropriately, these two suggestions come from the Family Fun website!  Check it out here!

Pumpkin Bowling

Arrange a triangle of 10 empty plastic 1- or 2-liter bottles. Players take turns gently rolling a pumpkin into the pins, with three chances to knock them all down. 

Pumpkin Roll

Determine a starting line and a finish line. Set 2 pumpkins on their sides at the start and have the racers line up behind them. At "Go," each pair of challengers uses sturdy brooms to propel the pumpkins over the finish line.

Teens: Building Character

I found a great article from Focus on the Family about character-building with teens.  You can find it at this link.  Read it and share your thoughts!

How do you work on character-building with your teens?

Thankfulness: Operation Christmas Child

^{Matthew 25:34-40} “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’ “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.

This is sort of a double-promo entry today.  First of all, one of the easiest ways to improve thankfulness is to increase serving and giving.  We are trying to reach out to "the least of these" through the Operation Christmas Child.  AND... to start getting people thinking about the Financial Peace University course this spring, here is Dave Ramsey talking about OCC!  

Don't forget to bring your OCC boxes this Sunday!

Prayer

^{I Thessalonians 5:16-18}  Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

So, let's talk about prayer...we all want to do it- especially we want to regularly pray for our children.  If you're like me, though, it's easy to get overwhelmed with all the things you want to pray for your kids, and then I find myself only throwing up the occasional prayer as I think of it.  Enter the monthly prayer calendar...click here to see it.  It comes from a great blogger named Kat at inspiredtoaction.com. This has been such a useful tool for me and my family.  It has a topic and a scripture to pray for your kids each day of the month.  


We've added to it a little bit- since it only goes to day 30 and some months have 31 days, we have added praying for our children's future spouses on day 31.  Also, we have added in people that we want to pray for on the number day of their birthday- we have written them in on the calendar itself.  For example, my husband's birthday is October 10th, so on the 10th of the prayer calendar, we wrote his name...so at the very least, we're thinking and praying for specific people once a month.  It has really helped my scattered brain to be more intentional about prayer for my kids, my family, and my friends.  


What tips or tools do you use to improve your prayer life?

Thankfulness: Veterans

If you haven't already, take time to thank a veteran- and have your kids to the same.  We need to pass on a legacy of thankfulness to those who have preserved our freedom.

Thankfulness: The Thankfulness Tree

As I mentioned last week, the character trait theme of the month is: Thankfulness.  Here is one idea to help you and your family focus on thankfulness this month: The Thankfulness Tree.

Directions for The Thankfulness Tree:

1.  I went out into our yard and found a branch.  We don't actually have many trees in our yard, but my dad had chopped a dead one down earlier in the summer and I was able to make use of part of that for this project!  I'm sure all of you have someplace you can find a branch!
2. I googled "maple leaf template" and found this link. I printed it out on my computer and then I printed it again, this time on cardstock.  (Learn from me and do this the first time!)  There is also this link, which offers some other leaf-shapes.  You could also totally make these free-hand or even as you're cutting them out, but I thought I'd share some templates with you just in case you are not confident in your leaf-shape-cutting skills. :)  Also- rather than printing onto cardstock, you could print onto regular paper, cut it out, trace it onto cardboard, and then cut that out, and voila, you have yourself a lovely leaf template. :)  I cut mine right out of the cardstock.  Not as nice and thick as cardboard, but it gets the job done.  Some of you may even be lucky enough to own some sort of large leaf stencil.  We have TONS of stencils, and we had some leaves but they were all too small.
3. Obviously, after you make the template, the next step is to trace it onto paper.  I used some cute fall-colored scrapbook paper, because I have a RIDICULOUS amount of scrapbook paper that I need to use up.  Any paper will do, though.  I also traced mine on the back of the paper so you wouldn't see my lines on the front.
4. Next I cut it out, and went to find Phoebe.  I asked her what something was that she was thankful for and she said "Bubby" (her blanket).  So I wrote Bubby on the leaf with a sharpie.
5. I punched a hole in the leaf, put a little string through and hung it on the tree.  Doesn't it look lovely? Actually, you can hardly see it but it's on the top right in the pictures.  Hopefully we'll be able to add a lot more to this!

I will present this tree to my whole family tonight at dinner, and I'm sure Naomi will be more than willing to trace and cut out millions of leaves for us.  Then maybe I'll put them in a little basket so we can add to our tree frequently!  We should make a goal for how many we want on our tree by the end of November...how about 50?  That sounds good for our family.  

What's a good number for your family?

*Tip: Make sure YOU'RE using the tree too!  This isn't just for kids. :)

**Tip #2: I've also seen this project done with a large cutout paper tree that you can tape leaves to, or write right on the tree!  Find a way that works for you, and then share!  I'd love to hear about it.

***Tip #3: If you're wondering how to comment, under this post it will likely say "0 Comments."  Click on that and it will guide you through posting a comment.  PLEASE comment!  

Parenting Tip: Build a relationship.

     It is my plan to include practical parenting tips on here on a regular basis.  We all need help with parenting and we all have something to offer, so I invite you to read and respond via "comments."  To comment, just click the "0 Comments" link and it will take you through the (easy) steps to comment.  As I've said, I really want to get an ongoing conversation of parents here, so PLEASE respond!  (If anyone has commented, then it might say "1 Comment" and so on.)

So, what's the parenting tip for today?  Here it is: Build a relationship.

     I've heard it said many times at various parenting seminars, on radio broadcasts and in books, but I think Josh McDowell was the first to coin this catchy little phrase: "rules without relationship = rebellion."  Perhaps some of us think it is inevitable that our children will rebel, but I don't think that has to be the case.  Of course there will be times in their life when they become more independent and may test boundaries and so on.  But if they feel connected to us through relationship, we will have more influence on their lives.

     If we look at how God parents us, we can see a model for building relationship.  God gives us rules, yes, but He doesn't leave us there to follow them on our own, getting frustrated and angry.  First of all, we need to realize that everything God tells us to do is for our good.  (Just like we tell our kids to go to bed, stay out of the street, don't eat too much candy, etc.  It is for their good!)  But He wants an intimate relationship with us.  He wants us to come to him and tell him about our day, share our sorrows, share our joys.  He wants to comfort us, rejoice with us, and know us.

     Now, since He created us, He does know us--better than we know ourselves.  Regarding our own children, we have to try a little harder.  This is where relationship-building comes in.  Let's examine ourselves- do we mostly speak to our children to correct them?  To redirect them?  To discipline them?  Let's take time to talk with them with no agenda.  Take time to do things with them that are what THEY want to do.  I am so guilty of only spending time with my kids on my terms.  Sometimes the things that they want me to do (crawling around on the floor, playing dress-up, playing Candyland--can I just tell you how much I hate that game?!) are not the things that I want to do.  But if I'm truly serving my kids and interested in knowing them, I need to bend to them sometimes and do the things that they want to do.

     One special way that I have been able to connect with Naomi (my 6-year old) lately is through lunch notes.  In her lunch I put a little notebook and a pen in the front pocket.  Each day I write her a little lunch note, and often, she writes back.  These little notes are not deep or earth-shattering, but I do feel a special connection with her through these notes.  I'm hoping that as she gets older this can evolve into a journal that we pass back and forth.  Sometimes it's easier to talk about things in writing than it is in person.  And the written word can very special and personal.  I plan to save all these notebooks and journals.

So my encouragement today for all of us parents is to look for creative ways to get to KNOW our kids!

What is one way you build your relationship with your children?

Character Counts!

        One thing I've wanted to do with my family is focus on a character quality each month and do some activities to support building character in my kids.  I'd love to have you all join us!  I'm hoping that putting it up here will push me to do it with my family!  Share your ideas, too!  So, for November, I'm going to make it easy and choose Thankfulness as our character trait.  So I pose this question to you: what do you do to increase thankfulness with your kids?

Vineyard Kids News Update

We're coming up on the 1st Sunday of the month, and we will be having the Vineyard Kids Elementary class this week!  We're going to open up an opportunity to the Elementary class- we are hoping to raise some money in the their class so they can purchase something from the Samaritan's Purse catalog. So, if you can,  send some change with your elementary student!  Maybe they could do some extra chores to earn  a little cash to donate! 

Also, this is just an encouragement to put together an Operation Christmas Child shoebox.  It's so fun to do this together as a family!  It's a great opportunity to help your kids look outside their world to those who are less fortunate than they.  I will be collecting the shoeboxes on or before November 21, and I will deliver them to a local collection facility.  You can learn more about what Operation Christmas Child is all about at this link.

If you have any questions, feel free to email me at carolyn@wellsborovineyard.org or leave a comment on this post!  Don't forget to sign up to have this blog delivered right to your email inbox every time there is a new post! 

New Blog Format!

We are launching a new format for my blog and I am SO excited about it!  As it says under the "purpose" of this blog (see right), I want to equip and encourage parents to raise spiritual champions.  I'm in this game too, right along with the rest of you, so I hope that we can all help each other.  I welcome your comments (you can feel free to comment below) and I hope that we can develop an ongoing conversation about parenting.

As the Children's Director at the Vineyard Church of Wellsboro, my goal for all the kids in our church is that they would grow to be spiritual champions, living life completely sold out to God.  I want their relationship with Christ to impact every area of their life and of course, the lives of everyone around them.  I believe we can have families that draw others to Christ.  At the Wellsboro Vineyard, we will do everything we can to encourage our kids to follow wholeheartedly after Christ, but we are only one part of the puzzle.  Parents, you are the PRIMARY spiritual teacher of your child, and as the church, it is our goal to equip you and encourage you to take that responsibility seriously, and don't assume "the experts" at church or even at a Christian school can take care of that for you.  You have to do it.  God has entrusted these children to you and you have the privilege of raising them in the fear and admonition of the Lord.

As I said, I am so excited about this new blog format, and I have tons of ideas.  I can't wait to share thoughts, ideas and questions with you regarding parenting, and I hope that we can have an ongoing discussion through this blog.  My goal is that it will be another way to spur you on to be completely in touch with the heart of your child.  I would love to hear any ideas you have for topics we might address here, or resources that have helped you.  I love to research parenting techniques and ideas and I will be relying heavily on resources offered by Christian parenting experts.  I can't wait to get started and travel this journey together.  I'm also eager to hear from more experienced parents who have been through the trenches of child-rearing and have some wisdom to offer us from their experiences.  Thank you all for your interest in and dedication to the future generation that is rising up to take their place in history.

in Him,

Carolyn